Self-confidence makes a big difference in the happiness and well-being of children. It’s no wonder that parents seek out ways to boost child confidence.

Some parents believe that frequent rewards and continual positive feedback is the best way to improve children’s self-esteem. Of course it’s a good idea to take note of your child’s accomplishments, but that alone does not build confidence. Letting your child know how proud you are may be an effective strategy sometimes, but don’t overdose on it.

Self-confidence is a combination of external and internal positive rewards. When you say, Great job, Well done, or I’m so proud of you, you provide the external reward. The child’s beliefs about his or her capabilities, strengths, and efforts is what creates internal self-confidence.

Confidence skills can be learned. Examples of children’s confidence skills are recognizing their strengths, valuing their own opinion even if it is different from their peers, knowing that effort and trying really counts, looking self-assured, and using self-reward for a job well done. These skills all improve kids’ self-esteem and can be learned in a lasting, meaningful way.

Our nationally acclaimed Charge Up Your Confidence Tool Kit for Kids teaches children and teens in grades K-12 how to use these important confidence activities in the real world. The Confidence Tool Kit also provides clear strategies to deal with situations that can topple confidence, such as making errors, getting criticized, feeling embarrassed, and not being perfect.